So I have started to interview nannies to watch the kids while I take some weekend classes in soapmaking.
Today I had the pleasure of a phone interview with "Giselle". Giselle's voice seems awfully deep for a woman and she's (???) "been through a lot" but is in a "very happy place right now." And children make her (?) very happy right now. She (?) did hair and makeup but there was "too much drama" at the Clinique (?) counter. The youngest of 8 she (?) has watched her nieces and nephews "a lot".
OK---so being in a happy place is good, right? I like happy people in happy places. But Dear God, Woman (?) I don't want to hear about it. Tell me you know CPR and all of the songs from "the Sound of Music"--that you know how to give a baby a bath and clean the fold where her head meets her neck and where the drool collects. Tell me you know how to subdue an out-of-control pitbull at the park and all of the words to "Where is Thumbkin?". Tell me that you love cloth diapers and that it doesn't freak you out that I nurse my babies until they are ready to wean. I want you to know how to draw an elephant and boil pasta al dente. That's all...
So Giselle was getting lunch and we didn't really get into any details. I asked her (?)to call me back after she (?) was done. My parents showed up unexpectedly and I my day was thrown completely out of balance. "I called" said Whoozyergrandma. She had called 60 seconds before their arrival. It doesn't matter...it was nice to see them and they know that I like a pleasant surprise. So I didn't answer my cell when Giselle did call. She(?) called 3 times. I listened to her (?)2 messages, the second of which she (?)used to convey her hope that nothing bad had happened to me. I called her (?) back to reassure her that I hadn't been flushed down the toilet. And she (?) said "Oh good, I worry. I have a problem with worrying. I'm just sure something bad is going to happen to someone I know." 'Oh---well, uh, I'm fine, thanks for your concern. ' I said, warily. "We don't have to talk now---we can talk tomorrow, if you want. I'll call you---or do you want to call me?" she asked. 'I'll...call...you" I answered.
Don't get me wrong. I'd hire a SANE transgendered person; Miss Mary Poppins with electrolosis and gladly accept "A Spoonfull of Sugar"sung cheerily in a lower octave. But maybe I shouldn't call people off of Craigslist:
Hello, my name is Giselle, I have been babysitting since my teens, mostly for
family. A little bit about me( I am fun, loving, caring, energetic, committed,
loyal and a social person). I live in Pleasant Hill by DVC. I am looking for a
good and loving family that could use my help part-time or full-time. I do not
take jobs from overseas, there will be no agreement reached until a formal
interview is had. Online scammers, please don't waste your time;)
Here's one plus about her (?)--if I hired her (?) at least I wouldn't have to worry about my husband falling for the college-aged babysitter...